PATMOS FELLOWSHIP CHURCH – GITHURAI 45

Overcoming unhealthy dependence : Part One

patmos — Wed, 14 Oct 2009 08:08:20 +0000

By Pastor Josphat G. Charagu
Introduction
In one way or another, we all find ourselves depending on others. There is a saying which states that, “No man is an island”. This means that we all need each other. However, the extent to which we rely on others can make or break us. Any kind of reliance that leaves a person completely dependant on others is dangerous. It is unhealthy. It takes away the belief that one can be self reliant and rely only on God. If all the people who support you today withdrew their support, would you still remain on your feet? If your husband / wife, your children, your boss, your friend or any other person who supports you is no longer available for you, would your life continue as usual? All over the world, including the developed countries, many people find themselves trapped in unhealthy dependency which end up making them slaves and victims of hopelessness and desperation. Unfortunately, this unhealthy dependency starts slowly and innocently in the lives of its victims and before they realize it, it is already a force within themselves that they can hardly control. The African continent is the hardest hit by this epidemic. The church in general and the missionaries in particular have played a very big role in this enslavement to unhealthy dependency. This explains why most churches cannot survive on their own. They must rely on foreign aid and foreign personnel to run their affairs. If the church as an Institution is not self reliant, what about its followers? There is no way a follower can be better than the one leading him. This shows exactly how the ordinary Christian is enslaved by unhealthy dependency. This further explains why many Christians are hardly successful in their day to day lives.
The consequence of the above situation is the stagnation of African Christian churches and their followers. Many Church ministers and leaders rush to the western countries in search of assistance while leaving behind a lot of resources at their disposal back in Africa. To understand these teachings clearly, let me give some definitions.

Dependence
This is a situation in which a person depends on the help and support of someone or something else in order to exist or be successful. It is a situation where someone is addicted to something. Did you know you can be addicted to relying on others?

Unhealthy
This means something that is harmful and likely to make you ill, weak or even kill you. It can be an unhealthy food, drink, behavior, environment etc. It is dangerous to the existence of the person in such a situation.

Unhealthy Dependency
This is a kind of reliance or dependence that is harmful and likely to make you ill, weak or even kill you. It is too much dependence that leaves the person free of any responsibility and therefore fully relying or depending on someone or something else for his or her existence. Without this help and support, the person cannot exist and if he exists, he cannot be successful. This means that the person’s life is not in his own hands or his own control. It is controlled by external forces and therefore the person is a slave.

Self Reliance
This is a situation in which a person does not depend on the help and support of someone or something else in order to exist or be successful. Such a person is in full control of his own life and existence. He is not subjected to external forces. He is therefore not a slave to anyone and he therefore exists freely and leads a successful life.

Where is God in Self Reliance?
Maybe you are asking me, “Pastor, how can I be self reliant and yet we are supposed to lay all our burdens at the feet of Christ, then relax and have a good time? Friend, The Bible says that the Lord will bless the work of your hands. If you are not doing anything with your hands or your head (brains), what will God bless in your life? Paul said that he who doesn’t work should not eat. If you can relax and do nothing, and not be a burden to anyone, well and good. Go ahead, sleep the whole day and the whole night. However, this can only happen in another world, not the one we live in. I must state clearly here that Self reliance does not exclude God from the control of our lives. It means that the person is fully responsible and accountable for his / her life as a good steward in line with the Scriptures and the guidance of the Holy Spirit. Any other influence or dependence is subjected to scrutiny so that it liberates, empowers and equips the person to be more productive and fruitful as opposed to enslaving through unhealthy dependency.
God is the initiator of liberation. When Adam and Eve sinned at the Garden of Eden, God knew that satan wanted to enslave mankind and take away their self reliance and reference to God. That is why the devil tried to discredit God by telling Eve that God was not honest to them when He told them not to eat the fruit. God however was quick to restore mankind to freedom. This redemption was finally fulfilled at Calvary through the death of Jesus Christ. In my view, any church or religion that does not liberate its followers from unhealthy dependency is not worthy calling itself a church or even relating itself with Christ.

If you over-rely on other people or other things for your existence or success, it is the high time you re-evaluated your life, go back to the crossroads and take the right direction towards self-reliance. God did not purpose that you be a dependent of your parents, your husband, your wife, your brothers, your sisters, your children, your employer, your friends, your neighbors, your church, your government etc. He did not give you those people so that you could be a burden to them. No!!!! They are meant to facilitate or help you to be self reliant. They are not supposed to give you the fish to eat. They are supposed to give you the fishing equipments to catch your own fish.
God is therefore a supporter of and an advocate of self reliance. God does not enslave, He empowers, equips and liberates.

In Part two, I will teach on how Africa and other developing countries and their inhabitants became and are still becoming slaves of Unhealthy Dependency.

Making our history today

BIZKENYA — Thu, 20 Aug 2009 15:19:38 +0000

“Making our History Today” It is usually easy to read, enjoy and even practice the history that was make by the people who lived before us or who are still living today. When you say that so and so is your mentor, you actually mean that he has made some history on which you rely on directly or indirectly. Do you know that Christianity, of which we are very proud and faithfully commit ourselves to, is a history that was made by Our Lord Jesus Christ? It is so amazing that he so much influenced the world in such a short period of time (33 years only) that the influence is still increasing 2008 years after His life and ministry on earth. This is a person who knew that whatever he did would make and be part of history today. I believe that is why he was always very careful and cautious on whatever he did or said.

So long as we call ourselves Christians, we must accept the challenge of making our history today, so that it can continue to influence and change the world long after we are gone. If you were to die today (God forbid), what kind of history would you leave for our future generations which include your own children, brothers, sisters, friends etc? Let’s think about this for this week. Make God help us to make History today.

(Please feel free to make your comments or respond to the thoughts of the week posted here. Your comments help to encourage others.)

Meeting with yourself

BIZKENYA — Thu, 20 Aug 2009 15:18:11 +0000

Hi Friends, have you ever held a “Meeting with yourself” whose agenda was “Performance Evaluation” in the last one week, one month, one year, five years etc? If successful companies do it, why not you? It doesn’t matter how much money you have, but so long as you do not feel a sense of success, you will still not be motivated. Your morale will always be very low. The greatest motivator in life is not money, it is success. Without self evaluation, you can hardly succeed. An honest meeting with yourself is therefore inevitable if you wish to succeed.
When the master gave the three servants some talents to invest, he never told them what to do with them, however, when he came back, the first thing was an evaluation of what they had done with them. Those who had self-evaluated themselves without being prompted, were successful and they pleased the master who rewarded them with more talents and prosperity. Comrades, God has given us a life, gifts and talents. He may not push us to self-evaluate ourselves but he is continuously evaluating us and rewarding us accordingly.

May God help us to take this challenge and do a self-evaluation. If the results are positive, give thanks to God, give yourself a pat on the back, congratulate yourself, talk well about yourself and reward yourself with a good treat.

However, if the results are negative, take it as a challenge, put the best foot forward and let the challenge become a turning point in your life. God bless you and I wish you well in the “Special Meeting” with yourself.

Our Market Value

BIZKENYA — Thu, 20 Aug 2009 15:15:04 +0000

Our “Thought” this week is on “Our Market Value”. Do you know that every individual has a price tag or a market value? Have you ever gone to a market place and observed how business is done there? Several commodities may be of the same make and looks but they all have different prices. Even when you pay for say an orange in the market, you dont allow the seller to choose for you the one he wants, no! You are allowed to choose the one that is worth what you have paid.

In 1 Cor 6: 19, the Bible says that we were bought at a “price”. This means that just like cows in a livestock market, all humans have an individual value. If we were all to be auctioned, you would be surprised by how fast some of us would be bought and buffled by how difficult it would be for some of us to get a buyer.

My two challenges to each one of us are:
1. What is your market value and how would others respond to it? How valuable or useful are you to yourself, your family, your company, your friends, your church and to the society as a whole?
2. What are you doing to increase and sustain your market value? A good car is known by its “resale price” If you cannot retain your market value for a long time, you risk becoming irrelevant and redundant. what is your resale price if you were to be sold tommorrow?

May God help us to give a thought to the above challenge. God bless you.

Pastor Josphat Charagu, your online Shepherd.
For all your personal questions, prayer requests, counseling etc, please email me: charagu@patmoskenya.org or call: +254 722 860 956

The Value of a Single Simple Step

BIZKENYA — Thu, 20 Aug 2009 15:13:03 +0000

Hi friend,
I hope you had a nice week. Our Thought for this week is on “The Value of a Single Simple Step”. When I was a small boy, I used to take my father’s cattle to graze in the forest. One day as I sat under a tree, I saw a Weaver bird come with a piece of grass on its beak. It fixed it between some leaves in one of the trees and left. After some time, it came back with another piece of grass and fixed it on the same spot. It repeated the same for several hours and I realized that something good was taking shape. By the time I was going home, the weaver bird had already built its nest half way. By the end of the following day, the nest was complete.

This weaver bird taught me a lesson that has kept me going to date. “Never ignore the little you can do however insignificant if may appear”. Never ignore whatever you have however small it may be. You just need to do whatever you can, using whatever little you have. You can ignore a piece of grass but that is what a bird needs to build a nest. You can ignore the little ability you have or whatever little resources you have but that is what you need to build your life. May God help us this week and through out our lives to appreciate the value of every single small step that we take as we build our lives through Christ who strengthens us.

Verse of the week: He gives power to the weak, and to those who have no might, He increases strength. (Isaiah 40:29)
God bless you.

Pastor Josphat Charagu.
Thanks to all those who made their comments on last weeks thought. I am encouraged to write more.

Uniqueness

BIZKENYA — Thu, 20 Aug 2009 15:11:49 +0000

Hi Comrade, welcome to Patmos Fellowship Church. I am Josphat Charagu, your online Pastor. I will be pastoring you online through weekly thoughts and occasional sermons in addition to many other ways. The spiritual life of an individual can only be ignored at the individual’s own risk. As your Pastor, I cannot and will not gamble with your life. Remember: “Your physical and material development is directly proportional to your spiritual growth. I am proud to have you as my online church member. Welcome.

Thought of the Week:
Our thought for this week is on Uniqueness. Each one of us has been uniquely created. No one is like the other. Even identical twins have some differences. Have you ever wondered how the world would be if we were all the same? Imagine your house or your office with similar items. Imagine a life without diversity. If all days were the same, the world would be very boring. If all the people were like you, how would life be? People with the same weaknesses and strengths like yours, the same likes and dislikes like yours etc. Life would come to a standstill.

All the above explain the importance of uniqueness. This is what God considered when He created everything uniquely, you and I included. God has a unique blue print for each one of us and every blue print goes with its unique successes, prosperity, satisfaction and blessings. Your uniqueness is your asset, utilize it to the maximum and you will be more than a conqueror. Why then do people want to be like others? Just think about it this week. Have a blessed week.
Verse of the week: Psalms 139:14: I will praise You for I am fearfully and
wonderfully made……